Why the hell did I just receive a “notice of overdue violations and impending registry non-renewal” in the mail today for a parking ticket I never received in a city I don’t live in or visit. God’s telling me I need to leave.
I’ve been feeling it deeply that it’s time for me to move on in all ways. The last time I was stagnant and stuck in a cycle, I had to force myself to break it and move on. And I did. I jumped into a new life. And now, even though I’m in a much better place, I’ve found myself again stuck in a stagnant cycle. Things have to change. I see what I want and what I’m doing now, where I’m living now, where I’m headed now, won’t lead me to it. Won’t bring me anywhere to be honest.
I need to leave this city for sure. I’ve been thinking a lot about upstate NY. I want to settle down. I want to focus on dating and meeting people. I hate my job and can’t keep wasting hours, days, months, years of my life there.
Hurricane Sandy’s got me all shook up. I remember last year at this exact time, a freak nor’easter hit us bad and we were left without power or heat for 3 days. I remember sitting in my dark apartment by myself, surrounded by candles and the gas oven on. I remember being scared because the whole street was blacked out and I was alone. Please God be with us.
A Year In Our Lives 