So I have honestly listened to usher’s song climax like 20 times thus far. Something about it makes me happy yet incredibly depressed at the same time. Maybe it’s the fact that I feel like this is where I will end up in a few but I admire his will to fight even though he feels he’s losing. Honestly beautiful song. All day I have had this happy but sad feeling…it is the strangest thing. I am excited that I feel like there is really an end to this tunnel yet going though it is depressing. I will be revisiting Florida in three weeks and I am anxious because this has been the longest month and a half of my life. I am trying my hardest not to fall for someone a million miles away but after almost 2 months of just verbal communication and getting to know someone without and physical contact that becomes harder as we progress. I amofficially convinced that the only thing that can make me run at ths point is if sex is horrible. I am a complete mess. Besides my weird “I really don’t want o like him” thing….things have been decent. I have not spoken to my child’s father in weeks and I hope this time he’s serious when he said he will never call me again. Although I know that s a lie…a simple prayer won’t hurt.School is going…still kind of annoying because I’m not in any real nursing classes yet but it’s better than being in Bloomingdales. Lord knows I can’t stand that place but it keeps my son in day care so I do appreciate it…..30th time listening to this song. My favorite line is by far “you say it’s better if we love each other separetly. I just need one more time…I can’t get what we had off my mind” I’m about go….I have 1 more hour to myself to blast this song before any one else is around and I’m going to enjoy it.
A Year In Our Lives 